I sat on my sofa next to my daughter and picked up my laptop. This was an ill-devised plan from the start, but I needed to get a few things crossed off my ever growing to-do list and so, I decided to give it a shot. I turned on Elmo, got her a few toys and powered up my Mac. Maybe . . . just maybe I told myself. She came and sat on my lap and immediately climbed back off. For a moment, she was next to me, but then she went and sat on the floor. A minute later she was back on my lap again and then off to find a new toy, only to cast it aside a moment later. The next thing I felt was the corner of a book to the side of my head, she was climbing back on my lap with a book in hand. Needless to say, it was impossible to concentrate on my work.
That one word sums up my daughter well. In fact, it is often the first adjective used to describe her by almost everyone she meets. She is in constant, almost insatiable motion. It is like she is driven by some unseen desire or unmet need, always searching, continuously moving from place to place or toy to toy unable to stick with any one item too long. I have become accustomed to her motion, but I know that all of the things that she seeks will not satisfy her for long.
I know what she needs even though she has no idea. She needs me. She needs to learn to trust in my provision and love instead of seeking an endless array of entertainment and stimulation. She needs time spent gazing into my eyes and sitting quietly beside me. She needs to play with me and as she plays, she will learn and grow. I see what she needs, and I know what it is before she does. If only, she would trust me and know that I will take care of everything.
In the midst of her whirlwind of activity, I pause to think. Isn’t that what God is saying to me?
“Why are you seeking all of these other things when I am all that you need? You look to comfort, entertainment, accomplishments, other people, and a myriad of other diversions, but I am right here. I am the only thing that will satisfy your searching heart. Be still, gaze into my face and find all that you could ever want or need. Spend time in my word, searching, learning and delighting your heart in my presence. Trust in me. I know what you need before you ask, not what you think you need, but what you really need. You need Me.”
I have to ask myself, what am I truly living for. Do I want an easy life, a comfortable life or maybe an exciting life? Am I seeking to meet my own needs and desires or am I living for God and His glory? A “me” centered life, that seeks my own happiness is in reality the least happy of all. So now, it is time for me to stop all of the business, all of the endless pursuits and pursue the only One that can quench the desire of this insatiable heart. It is time for me to climb up on my Father’s lap and simply be still.
“Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will act. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noon day. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him.” Psalm 37:3-7a ESV